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Why People Have lack of Confidence?

Lots of people suffer with the occasional crisis of confidence, but for some people, lacking confidence almost becomes ingrained in their personality. Self-confident people have a positive and realistic perception of themselves and their abilities, whereas people who lack self-confidence generally feel inferior to others and are doubtful of their self-worth. They tend to isolate themselves and over-conform because they mistrust their own judgment and abilities.
People who suffer from a lack of self-confidence often hamper their own progress in life by not attempting to try anything new. If the lack is severe, sufferers will not try to succeed in anything because they think they will fail if they do. They suffer severely from feelings of inferiority to others around them. Some people with confidence issues are secretly aware that they have potential ability, but refuse to acknowledge it, thereby avoiding the risk of failure.

What causes a lack of self-confidence?

  • Setting unrealistic goals.
  • Past experience of failure.
  • Negative life experiences growing up.
  • Loss of a partner or family member through death or divorce.
  • Dwelling on unhappy experiences.
  • Experiencing too much pressure from other people.
  • Dramatizing the result of circumstances as being much worse than they actually are.

Do you lack self-confidence?

  • Do you give reasons for your actions unnecessarily?
  • Do you usually respond to criticism with excuses?
  • Do you use defensive body language frequently (often crossing arms and legs)?
  • Are you a perfectionist?
  • Do you think people see you as defensive?
  • Do you tend to attribute your successes to luck?

Natural remedies

  • Bach Flower Remedy Larch can help people develop a realistic sense of self-esteem and initiative.
  • Life coaching can help you improve your self-confidence and will help you set realistic goals.

Other ways to help your self-confidence

  • Start thinking positively about yourself. Make a list of all your positive traits - ask a friend to help. You’ll be positively surprised at how many great characteristics you have!
  • Change your self-talk. Your inner critic is much harsher on you than it is on anyone else. Speak kindlier to yourself. Next time you start to self-criticize, think “would I be this critical of a friend in the same circumstances?” The answer is likely to be “no” every time!
  • Don’t set the bar too high for yourself. Instead, set goals that are realistic and you’ll be able to meet them easier. This will increase your self-confidence.
  • Give yourself credit for all the good things you do and achieve.
  • Know that you can’t be good at everything. Sometimes other people are better at things than you are, that’s just life. When this occurs, it helps to remember that you excel in other areas.
  • Look at your strengths not your weaknesses. Every time you dwell on a weakness, think of something positive about yourself to counteract it.
  • Be assertive. Express your feelings and needs to your colleagues, friends and family politely, yet assertively. Learning to say “no” is a key part of this process.
  • Act as if you’re confident. If you move around like a confident person, you’ll soon start feeling like a confident person.Our physicality has a strong effect on our mental wellbeing. Even if the feeling confident bit takes some time, at least you’ll be projecting a confident image to other people!
  • Take a self-assertiveness class. Most urban areas have some kind of assertiveness or self- confidence course available. The good thing about going to one is that you not only develop the skills to help you in life, but you also get to meet other people who struggle with a lack of self confidence.

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